How to Please a Woman in the Bedroom
Many men take time to research ways they can meet women. They study pickup routines and hot dating spots. But meeting a woman and pleasing her in the bedroom are two separate issues, and you don’t want to sabotage your pick up efforts with a bad sexual encounter.
Never Underestimate the Seductiveness of a Kiss
Whether this is a woman you just met or someone you’ve been dating for awhile, you have to perfect the art of a kiss – and use it frequently. There’s nothing that turns a woman off more than a guy who simply rips off her clothes and tries to have sex with her without any foreplay.
Closed-mouth kisses aren’t the kind of arousing make-out session she’s wanting, though. Women want the kisses you provide to linger on for what seems like forever – even while your hands are working elsewhere.
She wants you to French kiss her – sometimes softly and sometimes aggressively. But you have to know how to work your tongue – and make sure you’re not simply thrusting it inside of her mouth, choking her.
If you notice she’s pulling away, then you might need to work on your kisses. It might be your style or it could be an issue like halitosis. Women will notice hygiene in a man – including his brushing habits.
Kisses aren’t just for her mouth, either. You need to learn how to kiss all of her erogenous zones, including:
* Her neck
* Her breasts
* Her stomach
* Her thighs
Many women get turned on by the all-over body kisses. It can be a major turn off if a man hops into bed and instantly takes her panties down for sex. She won’t likely climax this way – and you won’t be getting a second chance to prove you know what you’re doing.
Learn how to nibble as you kiss. Nibble her earlobes, her breasts (softly), and even gently bite her bottom lip – no pain, just softness. Your hands should be either framing her face or exploring her body.
Don’t resort to a teenage boy’s methods of grabbing and yanking on body parts. Grown women want to feel your strength as a man, but know that you understand that breasts can be sensitive. A titillating stroke goes farther than a pinch and a pull.
Use the Right Kind of Sex Talk
Women love to hear you whisper sexual and romantic things in their ear during lovemaking. What they don’t like is for you to try to make your session a porn movie in the first 2 seconds you land in bed.
Especially if she doesn’t know you very well, you watch for signs of what he boundaries are on that. Some men make the mistake of not watching what they say, so they simply get repetitive – saying, “you’re so sexy” over and over again.
Sure, a woman likes to hear that she’s sexy – but don’t keep mumbling it. And don’t blurt out, “I love you” if this is a woman you just met tonight. She won’t be impressed – she’ll think you’re creepy.
Some guys start using phrases like, “Who’s your daddy, little girl?” which can also make her feel unnerved. You have to get to know a woman’s style of sex talk before you engage her in it.
Learn the difference between soft core talk and hard core talk. Start with soft and if she responds, you might move it up to the next level and see how she reacts then.
Things to start out with include:
* Telling her how beautiful a particular body part is (her breasts, her stomach)
* Telling her she makes you extremely aroused
* Telling her how good she is at whatever foreplay she’s engaging in with you
Level up by getting more explicit in what you want her to do and what words you use. Understand that while you might have heard words like, “cunt,” “whore,” or “bitch” in porn videos, many women won’t like that because they’ll feel it’s disrespectful. Then again, some women might respond favorably to that.
It’s important that you know what her language is. Pick up on clues and see how she responds to what you say and what words and phrases she uses, too. You can mirror her sex talk so that you’re saying exactly what she wants to hear.
Keep in mind that some women aren’t into talking much at all. They’re more into quick, heavy breathing, moaning and other noises. Don’t try to force your woman to talk dirty to you in bed if she’s not comfortable. Over time, she might loosen up and attempt to meet your needs in that department.
Learn How to Please Her Orally
Oral sex is very important to a woman. It’s the stimulation she needs to orgasm with you during sexual intercourse. Some women don’t need it, but there are very few who would complain about getting it.
Some men are very selfish in this department. They expect a woman to go down on them and give them head, but won’t return the favor. That’s not the way to gain a reputation as being good in bed.
If you’re more than willing to go down on a woman, but don’t know if you’re doing it right or wrong, there are some tips that can help you get the job done to the best of your abilities.
First, don’t be the energizer bunny. Some guys go about it like they’re in a race. You should help her build up momentum. If you’re using your tongue on the exact same spot, extremely fast from the very first second, it’s not going to help her get aroused.
Women like it when you start out slow and build up into a frenzy with them. Explore her vagina with your tongue – and stop to kiss her mons pubis – that area of skin covering the pubic bone – or kiss her thighs. You want to make her ache for you to return your tongue to her clitoris.
Some men make the mistake of getting too rough down there. While soft, gentle nibbling is one thing, biting and pulling is another. Don’t get too rough (unless she’s into that sort of thing).
Always please your woman before you ask or imply that she should please you. No woman wants her man to cum before she does, because in many instances, that means the night of sex is over and she’s left unsatisfied.
If you can bring her to orgasm through oral and manual stimulation before you have sex, then it should be easier for her to orgasm while you’re having intercourse.
You might also want to use sex toys in the bedroom if this is someone you feel comfortable doing that with. Vibrators used to stimulate the clitoris can be used intermittently with oral stimulation to bring her to a higher climax.
Using sex toys doesn’t mean you’re any less of a man in the sack – in fact, it means you know how to please your woman by giving her exactly what she wants.
Don’t Be Afraid to Get Aggressive
Some men worry about being overbearing in the bedroom. They actually become too tame in bed, and women today might not like the tame types. They like a take-charge kind of man – but that doesn’t mean you have to get scary.
Some women like it when a man grabs her by the wrists, turns her around and presses her down over the couch, pushes her legs apart and has sex with her from behind. Not every encounter needs to be a soft, romantic lovemaking session.
If this is a woman who you’ve been dating for awhile, you can switch things up and use a slight show of force. That never means harming a woman or doing something against her will. If she responds negatively, back off!
But don’t be scared to use rose petals and romantic music and candlelight one day and catch her off guard for a quickie in the laundry room the next. This is what keeps things hot in your relationship!
And if you’re strong physically, use that mass to get her turned on. Pick her up and have sex with her against the wall while holding her up. That kind of strength is very sexy to a woman.
Fulfill Her Sexual Fantasies
Contrary to popular belief, men aren’t the only ones who have sexual fantasies. Women (even those who don’t read romance novels) have them, too. And if she’s willing to put on a Snow White lingerie outfit for you, you’d better be willing to dress up like Thor for her, too.
For women, sometimes there’s role playing involved, and sometimes not. Don’t pressure her to tell you her sexual fantasy, but you can bring up the conversation and share yours with her and ask if she has any that you could fulfill.
Maybe she’d love to dominate you for a night. She may or may not be at the level where she wants to engage in dominatrix behavior, but she might want to be in control without you having much of a say for a night.
Maybe she’s into one of the usual men’s fantasies – wearing a schoolgirl outfit and getting spanked by you. Find out, then buy her the outfit and have it waiting for her one night.
Some women take it to a whole new level of fantasies, bringing in another man or woman as a third participant or becoming a voyeur of the sex between her and her partner. It’s never a good idea to assume this is something she’d want – ask first, because most women would say no, but some wouldn’t!
Stimulate Her Clitoris While Penetrating Her
Part of the reason women roll their eyes when men harp about how big their dicks are is because size doesn’t matter. It’s all in how you use your penis that determines whether or not she’s going to get any pleasure out of it.
Of course size does help if you’re trying to achieve the exclusive G-spot orgasm. That requires deeper penetration, and doggie style is a good position to help with that. But many women have never experienced that, so most men need to concentrate on clitoral stimulation before anything else.
A woman’s clitoris isn’t right at the spot where her vaginal opening is, so your penis isn’t rubbing up against it unless you work hard to get in a position where it’s being stimulated directly.
Some men just assume that if they have a big penis, she’ll be satisfied. It has nothing to do with that. You want to make sure her clitoris is being directly stimulated during intercourse – either through the touch of your penis or your fingers.
If you’re approaching her from behind or doggie-style, for example, then you’ll need to reach around to her front and rub her clitoris with your fingers while you penetrate her.
If you’re doing it missionary style, it will help if her legs are positioned in an almost closed manner with your weight shifted upwards so that your penis makes contact with her clitoris as you enter her and bring it out.
When a woman has sex with you where she’s on top and in charge of her movements, it is easier for her to rub her clitoris against your skin and ensure she’s building to a climax.
Pleasing a woman in bed consists of three things. First, make sure you pick up on clues from her – looks, pulling away, or seeming to get into something vigorously.
Second, you want to be willing to ask and get feedback about what she likes. Women today aren’t shy about telling you, and if you don’t take it personally, you’ll enjoy getting better with her tips.
And third, keep the focus on her until she puts the focus on you and you’ll become a better lover in an instant. Women are more sexually liberated now – they’re familiar with sex toys, positions, fantasies and role playing. They’re not afraid to be wild in the bedroom, so open her up to a world of possibilities and she’ll thank you for it!
